Lights Out

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I’ve learned that when the dry times come—those long, numbing periods of days, weeks, or months in which God is not felt, purpose wavers, and I wonder if I’m even a child of God at all—I can faithfully wait it out, because dry times do not last forever. Prayerfulness is key.  I invite God in to my numbness. I continue on, with a small, flickering flame of hope that He will seem near to me again soon, and I will realize once again in my spirit that I am indeed His child, and His friend.

We are fearful little children, and we need much assurance.

You must keep on. Stay in contact with your church family. Keep going to the Bible study, even though there is no spark there anymore. Sing out and loud in worship, even though your heart is not in it. Tell it all to your Father. And wait.

My God crashes into me like a sudden wave. It’s always so very, very good when He shows up. And as I plod forward in the dry times, I am able more and more to remember all the times my God has surprised me with the gift of Himself, and I can trust He will show up again, when I least expect it.

He shows me that the thing that was meant for harm, my God turned on its very head, sat on top of it, and laughed.  And while I shook in my weakness and fear that I had to be strong, when I wasn’t, and suffered a dark, dark night in my soul, what happened then was stinging shards of light dawned on my deep sorrow, and I could see.

These are the gifts our great God gives us. We are free to suffer in our blindness, but always, every time, God claps like thunder and turns the lights on! He lets me know the dry times, the dark times, the numb times, the deep sorrows, so He can then surprise me again with His mighty Hope, and Overcoming, and Shocking refreshing, and unquenchable Light, and Spinning, Sparkling Life, and the Joy of His Triumph over all these things that threaten to utterly overshadow me in my frail humanness.

I love being surprised by Him every time. I love being loved by the Maker of Galaxies, Star Breather. I love my God beyond words, because He sees me and knows me. He thinks of me. He remembers.

And He always, always turns the lights on.

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